I'm Martha

I was about to post a "why" post. You know one that sounded a little like the following...

Why did my hubby have to get really sick? Why did I have to do it all for the last few days while he helped other families? Why is my yard not being mowed? Why is the animal still in the attic? Why did we have a "misunderstanding" about our paychecks and now the budget is messed up? Why God? Why?

Well, then my husband finally woke up from his "post funeral, I'm so sick" nap and asked "Why is it a competition still"? Why am I struggling?

Oh, good questions. I felt so like Martha. "God, why does my hubby get to be sick, but I was feeling terrible the day before he got so ill and got no chance to get better?" I had my list of grievances in my head. I still have to get up and feed the baby, change the diapers, get the kids ready in the morning by myself, cook dinner that nobody eats because he's sick. We even had to miss his family's vacation to St. Louis and the baseball game.

Then I realized I just had to get over it. I was worried and anxious about many things and was not sitting still. So I got over it. Yesterday I finished a crochet project while Martin napped and Matthew chatted with me on the floor. I read my book, I read my bible and I watched one of my shows. Last night I even stayed up a little later and crocheted on another project. So maybe I didn't get the laundry done or the kitchen completely clean, but I feel good. I was able to hold my patience with my kids and stay on top of the kitchen and get them ready for our play date this morning all with God's help. God has come through for me. Maybe it was nothing miraculous but it was to me. God is healing me and my husband. (And don't worry, there will be a vacation soon!)