Better outlook!

My hubby finally opened the drapes at the house and the bright (snow glare) of sunlight is finally coming in the windows at 2:50pm.  I wrote a terrible blog this morning about how bad my last few weeks had been and I was disappointed, down, depressed, and just not feeling it.  It seems things always start to look up.  Although I'm still a little down, I'm almost done with this day and hopefully tomorrow will be better!

I just posted about our new car and we were feeling that we were really being good stewards, examples, and had listened and prayed before making that decision.  In 2 weeks of having the car, as of yesterday, I can't drive it anywhere.  The check engine light is on and it chugged down the highway yesterday.  At -17 below with a windchill in the -30s I decided it wasn't worth it.  So that was just the beginning of the end of the disappoints these last few weeks.  The only "good" thing is, if I can make it to the dealership tomorrow (35 miles away) the car is still under factory warranty and Martin's daycare was able to take him for a few hours in the morning so he doesn't have to go with me.  Not my favorite idea of spending time while Martin is at daycare.  I would much rather be cleaning, planning bible study or something, but I will crochet and maybe look at my bible study.

My Christmas did not go as planned.  My hubby took a week of vacation including a Sunday (those are precious, we only get 4 Sundays off a year) and yesterday was just the tip of the iceberg.  Today we were suppose to worship together at a church of my choice, but couldn't drive anywhere.  So, we just didn't worship. Hard to go to your own church when you're technically on vacation.  We also have spent almost 4 days of this vacation at home.  As a stay at home mom, staying at home just isn't vacation.  I've been doing the normal stuff.  It's also frustrating a little that the hubby is home.  We don't have home projects (we don't own our home) or any big things to be done.  Luckily hubby was very good and we got a few smaller things done.  Like our health assessments for insurance (free money) and our taxes started etc.  I felt the whole day would be  wash, but it hasn't been yet.

As for Christmas, first time since 1992 that we stayed home is bound to bring up a range of emotions.  None of mine good.  The biggest disappointment was not getting to spend a lot of time with my grandma and feeling like I got zero time with my mom.  Also, I didn't actually do anything.  I'm a "do"er.  I love to go out and see things, shop, run around.  I love going to the grocery store or anywhere even if it's just normal errands.  I really haven't been out of the house since before Christmas.  The blizzard came, we drove to my parents and then I didn't leave their house either.  So 3 days in the house around Christmas, 4 days in the house at my parents, and now another 3 days at home have left me completely down.  I feel isolated beyond anything I've ever felt before.  I can't even get ingredients to bake something today because our grocery store is closed and the car doesn't work.  Not being able to get out can cause me to lose sight of everything and that is true again.  Luckily, tomorrow will come.  If I get stuck on the way to get the car fixed a friend will come get me.  I will make it out.

We were suppose to do things, but while on vacation Martin had a sick day and I ended up staying home with him.  Then, yesterday, before the car situation we were going to head out to the big city and use our gift cards to buy fun things.  So the disappointment is still there, I can see the top of the hole I'm in, but it's still tough.  I'm hoping I can get out of the funk for the rest of the day because this week is actually going to be great!