Letting the water clear

I finally started a new book called "Seven Spiritual Gifts of Waiting" by Holly Whitcomb.  I'm through the first spiritual gift of waiting which is patience.  We spent time at Wartburg this weekend, going "back home" so Bryant could attend a conference.  As I reread some of the spots in the first chapter I realized that my life needs to shift a little.  No matter how I was waiting, seminary was a waiting game.  You could see the end and each step seemed years away, but also only minutes from now.  I am waiting to hear from dear friends about their first "assignments" and am praying that they take the time to wait patiently and be active in the waiting.  I know that I got so caught up in the waiting and wanting of things to come quickly our senior year that now I realize things I truly miss now that I don't feel I'm waiting anymore.  For example, worship.  Worship that fit me and truly stretched and fed me.  A connection with spouses.  We discussed this weekend that we sometimes feel we're "in the middle".  We have thought about a lot of theological ideas and spiritual ideas that many lay people have not thought about.  We are in the middle and needing to be stretched, but our spouses can't be the only ones to do that.  So we have to open ourselves up to a new way of being stretched and fed in our faith.

The one quote I liked in the book is from Lao-tzu Tao Te Ching and it says Do you have the patience to wait till your mud settles and the water is clear?  Can you remain unmoving Till the right action arises by itself?  I am trying to move away from the waiting mentality of seminary, but I can sure look back even in the recent weeks to say "the water wasn't very clear with that decision", "I thought I could see through the mud, but maybe I should have waited."  I think as a culture that gets so caught up in the now and hurry mentality we should think about letting the water clear.  I think I will be asking myself that a lot more and spending more time in prayer before I make decisions and offer advice or my time to something.  As the books says "Is God saying no because this is only a prelude to a greater yes?"  I want to be wholly present for the moments in my life so I must wait and be patient.